An old friend of mine (…well, he’s 29… not that old) recently asked how to leave care behind when hitting on women in a social setting. I thought I would try to help, in the form of written word on a screen. Here are some things to keep in mind to help you "not give a damn" when hitting on chicks...
There’s Nothing to Lose
The first thing to bare in mind is that you are risking nothing. If it goes well the reward could be great, but if it doesn’t your costs are minimal. A drink? Some time? These things are a small price to pay for the opportunity to meet someone interesting. Go for it. There’s no reason not to. If the lady of your attention does not respond well to your affection, move on. Don’t take it to heart. Screw her. It’s her loss, and you’re no worse off than you were 10 minutes prior.
She’s only a Human
Although she might have beautiful eyes, smooth skin and an ass you would eat peanut putter off… she’s only human. No matter what her parents told her growing up, she is not a princess. She has flaws and insecurities and baggage just like the rest of us. You’re not hitting on Miss September, 2010… you’re hitting on a real estate agent who drives a Toyota. Treat her as such. If she’s out of your league and you approach her timidly… you are guaranteed to fail. If you consider no one “untouchable” then any woman in the place is… touchable.
Options are Limitless
So you strike out a couple times… don’t let it get you down. Move on. There are plenty of places to go and plenty of potential mates all around you. Just because you liked that blonde from the first bar doesn’t mean she should still be on your mind as you approach someone else an hour later. Let it go. Move on and keep an open mind. The more spaghetti you throw against a wall, the better the chances are that something might stick...
You’re Not Alone
Guess what… they’re looking for you. In physics every force has an equal and opposite force. You’re pushing for a lady… there’s a lady out there pushing for a you. Don’t forget that. If you feel like you’re all alone and nobody wants you… that will be the energy you put out there. Send a vibe of… “hey, I’m a good dude… you should want to know me.” If you're in the right place at the right time you are sure to eventually run across your equal opposite. Wait for it...
Animals Smell Fear
It’s like cologne. The scent that moves around with you is the first thing a woman smells when you come near her. Do you want her to smell fear, doubt and insecurity… or playfulness, lightheartedness and confidence? You don’t want to be arrogant, but you want to give a vibe that you’re on top of things. You want the lady-folk to look at you and say, “wow… I’d like to talk to him.”
Play it cool. Confident and self-assured. Don’t take it too seriously. If that chick isn’t interested… forget her. There’s no reason to give a damn… so don’t. The “who cares” attitude is a good one to sport when you’re out hunting. Laugh it off… smile a lot, and joke around with your wingmen. Women will see you having a good time and want to be included.
… if none of this works, buy an expensive car and wait outside the club.